Time to jog on

I WAS in a local park the other day and I saw a sign offering ‘free jogging sessions’.

How very generous. Up until now I never realised you ordinarily had to pay for the right to have a jog.

I’ve jogged a few times over the years, but have never paid. Does this mean I’ve been stealing?

Who do I owe the money to? Are the jogging police going to come for me in the dead of night, kick my door down, drag me out of bed, take me down town and waterboard me until I ‘fess up about all the times I’ve broken into a sneaky gratis canter?

They’ll be letting us breathe oxygen for nowt soon too, mark my words.