Relationships counsellors have revealed that 2nd January is the “Divorce Day”, as it has been found that on this day, most couples in troubled marriages finally decide to call it quits.
According to experts, after months, or even years, of thinking about it, the tension of a fraught Christmas is often the catalyst for relationship breakdowns and the start of the New Year brings these underlying problems to the surface and couples make their final decision to part.
Vauna Bauvais psychotherapist and couple’s counsellor at Nottinghamshire-based Nottingham Therapy, said: ”It can be very difficult at this time of the year with tensions building up both emotionally and financially.
At this time of year a couple have had to spend two weeks together and feel they have to make it as happy a time as possible with an element of forced jollity.
“If there have been tensions built up over time and they have been less successful in handling them, it can all come together at Christmas.
“One person might want it to be unrealistically romanticised and sometimes the other person is secretly thinking: “This is so awful I want to leave”.
“Over the year it is very easy for people to busy themselves and not be intimate emotionally.
“Quite often they have a functional relationship, keep the house running, look after the children and take the dog for a walk .
“At Christmas the guard comes down and they might talk to each other for the first time all year, realising they want different things
“Watching TV one might watch sport and the other soaps, They and their children might end up in different rooms.
“It brings it to their awareness that as soon as everything is different the quality of the bond between them becomes revealed for what it is.”
Support charity OnePlusOne has revealed that in their survey, of the six in 10 people who admitted having relationship problems, a quarter never sought help, while of those who did, 23 per cent confided in friends, 16 per cent in family members and seven per cent sought advice on the Internet.
However, it was also found that only four per cent turned to a professional therapist or counsellor and just three per cent went to a support service staffed by trained experts.
Penny Mansfield CBE, director of the charity, said that people rarely decide to separate or divorce suddenly. Often they’ve been thinking about it for months, if not years and seeking help at an earlier stage – when the first thoughts about separation creep in – can be the first step in resolving problems and make the likelihood of splitting up less likely.
However Vauna Bauvaise said four times as many people had turned to her for help in 2014, with many couple unable or unwilling to get divorced because of their financial situation such as being unable to sell their house.