At one end of the spectrum, I'm told, is the camp crusader who spreads cheer and good will – a Brian Dowling, if you like.

The other is sinister. An ever frowning enigma clad in black studded leather capable of striking fear into the entire New Zealand All Black rugby team.

Now, it stands to reason that somewhere in between this bizarre bipolar metaphor is a middle ground that I can use here. A place where you can be confident of finding an aggressive specimen of the species which won't devour you as soon as automotive copulation – in this case – is over.

And that is where the SEAT Altea Freetrack 4 comes in – wearing wellies.

In bright yellow the Altea is as camp as Christmas – but it has an edge. It's not limp-wristed. It's chiselled and defined and offers plenty of bulk to hit you with should you mock its demeanor.

Let's work from the ground upwards. The 'wellies' I was referring to come in the shape of the black plastic wheel-arches which merge with the bumpers. Along with the 17ins alloy wheels and jacked up suspension the Freetrack looks ready for anything – particularly in conjunction with its four-wheel-drive system.

I say 'system' because the Freetrack is not a bonafide 4x4. It is more at home on the road and drives itself using the front wheels for the most part but should you stumble across some rough stuff on your camping holiday – which is where this car is born to take you – it can switch half of its power delivery to the rear wheels, a trick which aids stability and economy.

The SEAT family resemblance is there – particularly the bonnet lines which carry some of the racing pedigree so admired in SEAT's flying machine – the Leon Cupra.

Unfortunately so is the grille which, every time I looked at it, reminded me of Daniella Westbrook in her septum-less pomp.

But it's not just the family looks that are in the genes, so too are the sporty credentials SEAT gun for with every model.

Thanks to its clever Haldex drive-train set-up and MacPherson derived multi-link suspension, the Freetrack is pretty well nailed down in the handling department.

And it needs to be because while you get to choose from two different engines – the 200bhp petrol and 170bhp diesel – they're both intent on going at a fair old clip.

The turbo-charged petrol engine derived from SEAT's parent company, Volkswagen, is more at home in the Golf GTi but here it is good for 0–62mph in 7.5seconds and 133mph.

The diesel unit, which will cost you around £1,000 extra, will hit 62mph in 8.7seconds and 127mph but at 41mpg you get an extra 11 miles-per-gallon over the petrol incarnation.

All of this means the Freetrack is surprisingly fun to drive. I shouldn't really have been surprised because while SEAT always pitch for a small slice of the volume market, they're also keen to maintain a sporty image – hence the primary colours, big alloy wheels, spotlights, twin exhaust outlet and thrummy engine pitch.

I can just see it tearing around a Spanish hillside in its home country with dust billowing out of the back end.

The problem with this car is that the small slice of action SEAT is pitching for is not a volume sector. The cross-over MPV sector is a small slice of the action in itself so it stands to reason that the yields for SEAT are going to be much smaller than, say, the hatchback sector that the Leon and Ibiza do so well in.

As a result you're probably not going to see many Altea Freetrack 4s which is a shame because I quite like its quirkiness. On the flipside, if you do buy one, residuals should be strong given that to all intents and purposes it is a Volkswagen.

That means your £20,000 which you will have to part with for a very well equipped Freetrack – you get everything from rain-sensitive wipers and dual climate control to an MP3 CD player and rear parking sensors – won't disappear overnight giving you a headstart when the kids up and leave and you want to swap your so called cross-over MPV for a blisteringly quick Leon Cupra.